"I Can't Put Her Down!"

"For Christ's sake, I just want to pee!"

It didn't take very long for our cherub to let me know she wanted to be held... constantly. If I put her down, she'd cry. As soon as I picked her up- fine. (And no... it wasn't an ear infection... yet.) When I told the nurse practitioner she pronounced- colic. Colic. Really? Are you shitting me? 

Now, this may not sound like a problem to some of you. Who wouldn't want to hold their sweet little newborn all the time? And now that I'm out of that particular phase, sure, I might be able to see that as well. But I was a stay at home mom with little to no help during the day (husband worked, mama in law not in close proximity, no siblings nearby, friends all worked). Her crying cut right through me so rather than let her cry for a few minutes (oh, that was just unspeakable in my book at the time) I actually had to resort to holding her while I went pee! It was bad. I had quite a few breakdowns. My mother-in-law said my husband was like that. Gee. Thanks hubby. She got your dark hair and your inability to go without being cuddled 24/7. My mother-in-law chuckled as she recounted vacuuming while holding him. I wanted to bang my head against the wall. All I saw ahead of me was months and months and months of never, ever being able to set her down for anything. 

It was colic in the sense that if I put her down, she cried. It was not colic in the sense that she would scream and cry for hours on end no matter what I did. That much, I can be thankful for. So how did I cope?

• I listened to It Won't Be Like This For Long by Darius Rucker and You're Gonna Miss This by Trace Atkins (the first song still makes my husband cry). 
• I got real familiar with our Baby Bjorn. Mostly we went for walks but I also did things around the house with her strapped in. 
• Went for walks in the stroller
• Exercised while holding her (squats, lunges, dancing)
• Started "Opa pa Thursday"- my Dad came over every Thursday and she was so content being held she usually just napped on him for a couple of hours
• Baby Swing (worked on occasion) 
• Tummy time (after a while we were able to do this with her and it helped)
• Grab'n'Go snack basket- Stocked a basket with granola bars, cereal bars, fruit snacks for easy grazing
• Prepared my lunches ahead of time
• Rested/Ate when she napped

The exercise bit was great. After I got married I packed on the pounds and for the life of me, couldn't shed them. I had pretty much given up on the notion of ever fitting into anything skinny again. Well, combine breast feeding with a reflux diet and a colicky baby and you get the best damn weight loss plan ever. In less than four months I lost all the baby weight and all the marriage weight! I got down to my wedding day weight. Looking back, I should have been less restrictive with my diet or just forced myself to eat more because it definitely contributed to my milk supply drying up just a little faster than I planned. 

Colic will pass. Bug's colic phased ended before she was two months old.  Carrying her a lot did not spoil her. Although she thrives on attention, she's more than capable of being left "alone" to play. At nearly 6 months she still has "needy" days that remind me of the colic times but I just recognize them as what they are and even though it can be annoying "I'm right heeeere kid! Relax! You're fine! I'm just putting some dishes in the sink!" 

Everyone told me just to enjoy her wanting to be held because one day, she won't be able to get out of my arms fast enough. True enough. Most folks also told us, "My baby had colic and by 6 months he was just happy all the time!" This, I can also attest to. Even when she had colic, whenever she was around people they'd say, "This baby has colic?!" Well sure, I'm holding her. She's happier than a pig in shit. Like I said though, the colic passed and like the other doll babies that came before, our little girl was touted as "One of the happiest babies" people had ever seen. Unless she's fighting a nap- now that's a nightmare for another post but largely and for the most part Bug is an extremely happy baby, very content and super social once she determines you're not a threat!

Yes, colic is one of those things that makes you want to rip out your ovaries so you don't have another baby... but it will pass. Eventually. Then you can look back and say a bunch of self righteous shit to the poor folks currently muddling through it.