Sleepy Time Blues!

This was an issue I had to wait on before blogging. Then things around here got so busy with "Bug" crawling all over the place that I plain didn't have the time! Of all of our baby bumps in the road, this one was hands down our hardest. There were two playing fields here. Bedtime and naptime. You'd think bedtime would have been the harder of the two, but for us it wasn't. Here's what wound up working for our family:

Bedtime

For us, bedtime was so haphazard. When Bug was a teeny tiny, she was often up late with her Daddy, watching basketball. For both bedtime and naptime she just kinda slept when she slept. We read posts on boards, websites, blogs, and books and by the time she was about 4 months old we finally figured out a bedtime routine. We came up with a few signals and stuck to them in order- religiously. In addition to that, we opted for the "controlled crying it out" method. True to the book crying it out just wasn't for our girl. She'd scream bloody murder, turn red, hyperventilate. Call us softies but we just didn't see any psychological benefit to terrorizing our child. She's gotta learn to cope but I don't think getting worked up into a vomiting session is necessary for that.

So we did the whole 5, 10, 15 type deal where you let them cry and then after a while go in and shush/pat without picking them up and then gradually increase the time between going in.  If it "got too far" and she was screaming, one of us would go in. There was a difference between her "NEED YOU" cry and her "Hey, I'd really prefer it if you'd come in here and love me" cry. The longest I think we let her go was half an hour or so (for bedtime... naptime is a whole different nightmare). If you Google controlled crying it out, you'll find a whole play by play for it. It worked for us, so hopefully you'll find success with it too. 

In addition to controlled crying it out, as I said we added a cozy routine. For her comfort (especially in the beginning) I made her a very soft and cuddly lovey which I wore under my shirt for an entire evening before giving to her so it would smell like Mama and help her feel more secure once we put her in her crib.

Our Bedtime Routine:

• Begin "wind down" (VERY important) TV off, lights dimmed, no excitable activity. This was about twenty minutes before actual bedtime. 
• Pajamas and overnight diaper
• Say goodnight to things around the house (na-night trees, na-night pictures...)
• Into Mommy and Daddy's bed for two stories (tucked in with Mama and her lovey). We'd read 'Goodnight Moon' and 'Bears in the Night'. Daddy would do the reading.
• After bedtime stories, Daddy would take the Doodle Bug. All lights would go out (a little weird, but it sends a very distinct message) and he would take her to her room, close the door and feed her her bottle. Once she finished her bottle, he'd give her a little goodnight speech, put her in her crib with lovey and leave. 

It took maybe a week or two before everything took full effect and Bug understood, 'Okay, this is bedtime and now I go to sleep.' So there is a happy medium between crying it out and just banging your head against the wall. These strategies worked really well for us. Babies crave consistency!

Stick to it, keep strong. Remember, "It won't be like this for long." Now we put our daughter down for the night and we can relax in bed, watch TV, read, talk... it's a little more like "normal" which goes a long way to keeping you sane! 

Nap Time... My Own Personal Hell

Nap time was a tougher battle. It was a battle Mama had to fight alone. 

Bug was a notorious "cat napper". Anyone who has ever been there can tell you, a baby who will only nap for 30 minutes max has the power to make you absolutely lose your mind. And I did. Repeatedly. Pitifully. Daily. She would wail, and rail and pitch a fit. This went on from about 3 or 4 months until about 6 months. During nap time there was a lot more crying it out, a lot more screaming. I tried to make her room as dark as I could, tried to establish a similar daytime routine for pre-nap. 

Ultimately what I think it came down to for Bug was getting a fuller belly. She was breastfed and just not getting enough. My production must have been pretty high octane in the beginning but eventually, it just was not enough for her. 
There were days (many of them) where I was either in complete shambles on the floor, or hiding in the bathroom with the fan on, video baby monitor and cell phone in hand. The wailing was unbearable but I knew she had to nap. During the day, crying it out could go as long as 45 minutes. There was a lot of praying, crying and cursing. 
What ultimately worked (I believe) were a couple of things:

1. She was able to sit up on her own and therefore instead of feeling abandoned and helpless, she began to sit up and just play with toys until becoming so drowsy she'd lay down and sleep. (But even this wasn't the case all the time).

2. Controlled crying at night helped her learn how to put herself to sleep. 
3. We not longer rocked her to sleep or allowed her to fall asleep nursing or at the bottle. She had to learn to do it on her own. 
4. Fuller belly. I hate to say this, but it came at the hands of formula feeds. That's an issue for another post though. By now she was eating solids for lunch and dinner and previously, I'd top it off with some boobie but boobie just wasn't cutting it. Once I switched to the formula, she started taking real naps. 

Granted, Bug is not the greatest baby sleeper of all time. It took her until she was nearly 8 months old to consistently sleep through the night. Every baby has their pace and it's our job to do the best we can to help foster healthy habits. For our family, it was a solid and cozy routine and consistency. Oh, and prayer. Plenty of prayer.